It’s dangerous to leave me in a bookstore by myself

Mikaela has been teaching private swimming lessons on Saturdays in Wausau for the past several weeks. This past weekend, I decided to come along for the trip, with a plan to go out to dinner and a movie afterwards for a belated anniversary date. But with no need for swimming lessons myself, no credentials to be teaching them either, and no YMCA pass to boot, I was left to my own devices while waiting for her to wrap up her pool time.

After a quick stop at Culvers for an ice cream and fries (not the most healthy lunch but what are you going to do) I made my way over to Barnes & Noble in Rib Mountain. Maybe just browse around a bit, maybe buy the next book in that Star Wars series I’ve been reading. No big deal.

I should probably not be left unsupervised in a Barnes & Noble.

Typically, Mikaela and I go together, which I think kind of reigns in my browsing somewhat. However, now by myself and needing to somehow fill two hours of my time, I was free to peruse the shelves to my heart’s content.

Fortunately, this meant that I was able to uncover a good deal more that peaked my interest than on a typical trip. Unfortunately for our checking account, this also meant that I was able to uncover a good deal more that piqued my interest and then wanted to buy said interesting things.

Oh look, a display for banned books? I wonder what is on there? Animal Farm by George Orwell and Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury? I’ve really been meaning to read those for awhile now… maybe I’ll just hold on to them as I look around.

Hmmm…that’s an interesting cover…The Cautious Traveller's Guide to The Wastelands? Seems to be some sort of alt history take on the Trans-Siberian Express. Could be interesting. Oh and now an employee is recommending it personally to me? Well, it would be rude to not take his recommendation,.I better just grab it for now and then I’ll put it back later. Probably. Maybe.

Hey, is that the new Spider-Man series in an alternate timeline where Spider-Man doesn’t get his powers until he’s 35 or something? I mean, I don’t usually buy comics, but I’ve heard good things about this one… maybe I’ll try it out? And while I’m over in the comics section, might as well grab the first volume of that manga I’ve heard good things about. Oh and the second volume of this other one and…this may be getting out of hand.

Wouldn’t it be cool to have a nice collectors’ edition of Parasite or Blade Runner 2049? Or the original Blade Runner? So many movies that I’ve been meaning to watch. Seven Samurai, No Country for Old Men, Pan’s Labyrinth. No, I can’t buy all of these. Well, I could. Technically. Would it be fiscally responsible? Um, no. Probably not. But still… No, no stop looking at the board games! They don’t have shopping carts at this store for a reason.

Alright, alright, I’ve got to cut something out. Okay, a lot of somethings… There, that’s more manageable, right? That’s only like…six books and a movie. That’s a normal amount, right?

I left the store poorer than when I entered. The damage had been mitigated somewhat, but was still far more significant than I had expected upon arrival. Whoops.

Some people buy clothes, some people gamble on sports, others save up for cars or ATVs or whatever. Apparently I spend my money trying to single-handedly keep the printed books business alive if I’m left unattended.

A C ERTAIN POINT OF V IEW