Security Health Plan employee shares her mental health journey

“It’s OK to not be OK and ask for help,” said Security Health Plan Director of Product Development Kristina Howey.

Howey was diagnosed with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) in 2016. Her journey with confronting past life events and managing her symptoms has taken years – years of struggle, healing, growth, learning and understanding. Her mission is to help others by normalizing mental health and sharing her experience.

According to the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs, 6 percent of American adults will have PTSD at some point in their lives. PTSD can occur after a traumatic event and can affect anyone, not just veterans.

Howey’s trauma began in her childhood and continued into her adult life. She was in an abusive marriage and it wasn’t until she was working as a research coordinator for Marshfield Clinic Health System she realized she had to get out.

“While working one night, I found a pamphlet on domestic violence in the women’s bathroom. I discreetly folded it up and brought it to my cubicle. I read it and broke down sobbing, realizing I was living in an abusive relationship,” she explained.

Four months later, with the help of the Personal Development Center, Howey bravely exited that relationship. She proudly calls this her “survivor day,” as she felt rebirthed after leaving.

In 2016, Howey’s aunt committed suicide, which stemmed from a past trauma of sexual assault at a young age. While the family processed this tragedy, Howey silently sat in the background knowing exactly how and why her aunt struggled. She knew if she didn’t get help, she would be at risk for her own situation to escalate and could foresee a similar ending if she didn’t act immediately. She began counseling and was formally diagnosed with PTSD.

“I spent a fair amount of time being in denial. I was sure my counselor had it wrong. But I started to reflect on what she described as symptoms and how that paralleled in my own behavior. I avoided places and things. I was suffering from a hypervigilance that never allowed me to feel safe but after I accepted my diagnosis, I began to open up,” she explained.

Howey was in therapy, managing her symptoms and learning to live with her condition. She had some changes with her health insurance coverage, and her behavioral health provider was no longer covered. Howey decided she would take what she learned from therapy and manage her symptoms on her own.

In 2019, she started a self-discovery journey through a gratitude practice, running, eating well and prioritizing her health. She thought she was getting better and had even registered herself to compete in a marathon, but then the COVID-19 pandemic hit.

Howey contracted COVID- 19 just two weeks before the marathon, which triggered a downward spiral. Like many others, she moved to work from home, which was isolating and caused her symptoms to flare. She knew she needed to start counseling again and found a new health care provider with experience treating PTSD and began weekly sessions.

“During counseling, I finally started to accept my diagnosis and be open about it and I started to better understand what it (PTSD) really is. That understanding allowed me to manage my symptoms, and I had a greater awareness of my trigger response. That was something that I previously couldn’t leverage in a time of crisis. Therapy gave me the tools to manage my symptoms,” she said.

Howey’s counselor suggested she would be a great candidate for a service animal. She began to train her puppy, Mava, with the help of a dog trainer in Milwaukee.

“Mava gives me a sense of safety, which has changed my life. I used to talk myself out of going into the outside world because it didn’t feel safe. Mava can alert me to rising symptoms and even helps with my nightmares. She chooses me and she protects my heart. I get to be myself around her,” Howey explained.

Through Howey’s journey to understand and manage her symptoms, she has gained knowledge about her mental health and it does not define her.

“Mental health is not who you are. It is not something you can control. These symptoms are real, and similar to a physical condition, treatment options are available,” Howey said. “I’ve learned to separate who I am from my symptoms. I am a capable, intelligent leader and I want to normalize having a mental health condition.”

Howey’s journey to better mental health has recently led her to visit a psychiatrist who classified her PTSD as complex. She’s since started medication, which has made a world of difference in her life.

“I’ve always felt like I was on a treadmill. I could run for miles and miles at constant steady pace, but with medication, the treadmill stopped. I never knew it could be turned off for periods of time. I’m grateful for the reprieve and having true recovery,” she said.

Howey lost years of her life struggling with her symptoms. Her hope is to normalize having a mental health condition and having a service dog. She recently attended a conference with her service dog, Mava. Although she was initially worried about drawing attention to herself, she was surprised how much kindness and support she received.

“I encountered so many supportive and genuinely kind people, which is a gift that has helped my PTSD more than I could have anticipated. I no longer have to feel unsafe in the world around me and I know there is still light amongst those dark experiences,” she said.

Howey continues to grow and manage her symptoms. Her team of health care providers and service dog provide her the tools and support she needs. She hopes that others struggling with a mental health condition know they are not alone and that help is available.

“You never know what other people are going through. At work, I lead with a level of humanity and always put people first. I want to make sure people have the support they need to feel their best,” Howey said.

If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health, there is help. Security Health Plan members can call and speak with an experienced care manager or social worker. Wisconsin residents may also visit dhs.wisconsin.gov/crisis/ talk.htm to view a list of phone numbers for someone to talk with or text.