How Does Your - How Does Your Garden Grow?

I'm definitely going to have to research our radishes a little better, because are they supposed to be looking this delicious this soon? We had a special little visitor at home last week. I walked into the garage to head to the office last Monday morning and noticed a bag of garbage had been pulled from the bin and scattered everywhere. I gave my daughter and my niece instructions to clean it up since they’re just bumming around on summer break and got in my car. When I pulled out of the driveway and onto the road, I saw a cute little skunk trundle through the ditch and into the woods. I had an idea then of who we were dealing with. To be fair, the lid was off the garbage can and one of us had forgotten to close the garage door that night, so it wasn’t entirely the varmint’s fault. When I got home my husband and I cleaned up whatever the girls missed and sanitized the floor, hoping to eliminate any temptations for the little guy. I didn’t close the garage door right away since the kids were still running in and out and I had to take care of the Poultry Pantry. When I came out to close the garage door for the evening, I almost stepped on the skunk who had walked himself up the stairs and was inspecting the very door I was trying to exit. To say we were both startled is a gross understatement. Thankfully, we escaped without any foul odors being discharged (on either account) despite our fear. Subsequently there was quite a bit of wrangling and scrambling which involved flashlights, lots of banging and shouting, some of which at the kids who have zero selfpreservation skills, and a quick recon from the safety of a vehicle before we were sure the skunk had fled the scene. This is not the first creature that has visited our home as a few years ago we had a very large and angry snapping turtle climb through the garage and up the steps to knock on the door. Now we know that when you live way back in the woods you may have some close encounters with your furry or scaly neighbors, and we have a healthy respect and appreciation for the fact that we built our house on their turf, so we act accordingly. I read that like cats, skunks do not like citrus, so I armed myself with lemon essential oil. Brian Wilson also informed me that cats do not like cayenne pepper and will avoid it at all costs. I did this at the office and it seems to be doing the trick, so why not try it with the skunk? I’ve been walking around smelling like some kind of fancy marinade while I try to keep the critters out of both areas, though it seems to be working because I haven’t seen anymore evidence of cats or skunks. But this lead me to wonder about the safety of my plants and the animals that will actually try to eat them, like my goats who seem to think it’s funny when I chase them out of my azaleas every night. While I don’t have a problem playing tag with my goats every day I don’t think the local deer would enjoy it quite as much and I worry about my little container garden. Someday I’ll have a big raised bed garden that’s entirely fenced in, but right now my budget is limited to what I can find for free or thrift on the cheap. To further complicate matters I am weird about my yard. I don’t like for it to appear messy or disorganized; even something so small as a hose left unrolled is enough to make my eye twitch. So how do I keep animals from eating my vegetables without compromising the sanctity of my beautiful, luscious yard? I’ve researched a variety of interesting solutions and there are a few that I’m willing to try. The first one is human hair. I’m sorry, it only gets worse from here. Hear me out; I read online that deer do not often wander into areas where they can smell people and human hair is a great way to bring that scent to an area. Now my husband’s hair grows as fast as a Bob Ross chia pet and since he was due for a good trim I shaved him down and we took the hair and sprinkled it around the containers. We’ll have to do that every time I cut his hair so the smell doesn’t wear off. And before you come for me, I’ve been cutting his hair for him since we met. I had his full consent. No husbands were harmed in the making of this column. The other suggestion that the internet gave me was human urine. I will spare you the details but trust me when I say that there’s not much I’m not willing to do to keep these vegetables alive. I’m trying to avoid putting up a giant, ugly orange snow fence that probably won’t keep the deer away but will keep me cringing every time I drive past it. Do not question my dedication to my yard’s aesthetic. I finally got those red potatoes planted at the office. A few days before I planted them, I cut my potatoes into chunks, ensuring that each section had an eye. I let them dry for a few days as I’m told this helps to prevent rotting. I used a cheap laundry basket and drilled some holes in the bottom before l added about three inches of straw. I then layered in four to five inches of soil. I placed the seed potatoes, eyes up, in the soil before again covering it with a generous layer of straw. The idea is to continue layering straw and soil to create a hill as they grow. I’ll keep it watered and then pull the straw away when the plants start to die back. Finally, something I’m supposed to kill. Mandee Ellis is a reporter at The Star News. Contact her at Mandee@centralwinews.com.